Sunday, June 26, 2016

John Grant: Global Warming

You people and your cute little terms - 
You like to throw 'em around and make everybody squirm:
Upper class, middle class, lower class, sassafras.
Everybody these days thinks that they're a bad-ass.

How am I supposed to live in a world with no Madeline Kahn?
My favourite girl is gone.
Bonny Dune's is now an Auto Zone.
Thirty-one is trash. Now I just want to be left alone.

Global warming is ruining my fair complexion,
Augmenting all my imperfections,
And Brazil does not need more encouragement.
Global warming encourages slack-jawed troglodytes
To leave their homes with guns and knives
In search of quality refreshments and some homicide.

So sick of hearing people talk about the sun.
They sound like a bunch of Aztec Indians,
And all they do is hang out clogging up the streets,
Congratulating each other on their pedicured feet.

Sure I like to see the fellas skateboard in their Vans,
Stripped down to their shorts so they can work on their tans.
I know I shouldn't care cause I'm a taken man
But I guess you can look, nobody said that you can't.

All I've got are first-world problems.
I guess I better get some of the third-world kind.

John Grant at Shaky Knees 2015

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